Passionate Green Mom
With Earth Day approaching, I have been feeling a little blue. Okay. Let’s be honest. Green and lonely. For over a decade I have been wearing the “green” and encouraging others to do the same. Pushing the envelope is what I do best to inspire others to follow suit. Remember, I was the one who started building an eco-friendly house in 2003. And trust me. Lots of the subcontractors and vendors thought I had a screw loose.
But despite my “can do” attitude, I often times feel that my green message either falls on deaf ears, annoys people or converts some. Yes, even now after the dawning of Al Gore.
Now, I will admit, I can get carried away and can spout off a gazillion ways to go green green without breathing, but blame it on passion. I love this little Planet. But yet, I still feel green and lonely. Maybe misunderstood too. Okay, perhaps a little judged? Some even think I am a kook. Do you feel the same?
Does this sound greenly familiar?
Why do I feel so green and lonely? Over the years, I have been in many situations where it is hard to watch how my community, school, or businesses I frequent have been less than kind to the Earth. Worse yet, your friends or families could be the worst offenders. I know I have tried to temper my passion with gentle persuasion like being green will save you money or “we only have one Earth” plea. Some people listen and others pretend that I am invisible. Sometimes, I don’t preach at all and just ask people to just respect my green wishes. Even then, I get mixed reactions.
So tell me. Can you relate to any of the following situations?
- You are the only one or two at a school PTA meeting/ or work meeting questioning why they are using bottle water or serving sugar laden sweets for a function?
- You question your school why they send home so much paper to get the proverbial answer, “school policy.”
- You wonder why the school supplies list looks like a trip to the plastic factory where every teacher requires a separate binder, folder, etc.
- You see cardboard on the side of the road or plastic bottles, and pick them up for recycling.
- Your company dumps enough paper in the trash to bin 1000 books.
- Your employer/school/relatives do not understand what it means to turn off a light, computer, or TV to save energy. “Why should they care,” they often reply.
- Your friend or family member does not recycle. When you try to explain why it is important, they give you a blank stare. And behind your back they murmur “treehugger.”
- Forget trying to green an event at school or work. People just think you are loony.
- Or you have asked specifically that certain non-green items not be given to your children, such as plastic toys or certain foods, but such requests are ignored. (Um, or bring disposable plastic into your home.)
Now, don’t get me wrong. I understand when people preach “I am better than you because I am so green,” it can be a real turn off. Yeah, we all know them. They are the ones that push their Prius cars instead of drive them.
But as I looked over my list above, it made me feel even more lonely and sometimes a little helpless. I questioned were all my efforts in vain? So, I decided to post two polls on Skinny Scoop, a great women site for sharing and comparing questions about parenting, products, and personal issues. First, I wanted to see if your families and friends were supportive or annoyed at your green efforts. Secondly, I was curious if other moms were annoyed or supportive of your green efforts. Please take the above polls. I can’t wait to see the outcomes.
The bottom line? I know there are other women (and men) who must feel the same way I do. And Mother Earth thanks them for sticking to their guns to make this a better world for our children. Just keep hanging in there. In fact, hang out with me on Green Talk so we can help change the world together.
Join the Conversation:
- Do you feel green and lonely? How come?
- Misunderstood and/or Judged? How so?
- How have you been successful in getting people to be more eco-conscious
- Have you given up and just resorted to living your own life as green as you want?
- Have had you been able to get family/friends to respect your green wishes when it comes to your children and home?
Condo Blues says
Anna, it’s true. You are a kook and that’s why I love you! You are a kooky kindred spirit 🙂
I noticed that when people find out that I’m a green blogger that they get that deer in head lights look. I guess they think I’m going to point out all of their eco-faults or something. That’s not my style. The latest was overhearing relatives in the kitchen say “, Well LISA used a zipper baggie!” when playing jenga with leftovers in the fridge. And yes, I did use a zipper baggie because our hostess lent out her glass storage dishes with food for friends and hadn’t gotten them back yet. I used what she had. I also gave her a nice set of pyrex dishes with lids at the next gift giving opportunity because she was interested in mine.
Anna@Green Talk says
A kook? Why would you think this? (Don’t answer…)
Give me an example of how you have helped convert the deer in the headlight look to seeing going green isn’t so bad or mysterious. Link to an article that you wrote, if you have one. Anna
Plastic-free Beth Terry says
Yes, in real life. But I love the support I get from my online readers and friends. I may feel like the only person in my office or neighborhood who cares about these issues, but the Internet allows us to connect with like-minded people throughout the world and bring our collective voices together!
By the way, here’s what my husband thinks about my plastic-free efforts:
http://myplasticfreelife.com/2.....-flanders/
Betsy (Eco-novice) says
The truth is, I don’t put myself out there that much, b/c I don’t want to deal with the push back. My MO is to encourage green by example and preach to the sympathetic choir. My husband’s family doesn’t even know about my blog or my green efforts, and, honestly, I try to keep it that way. Since his two siblings are basically the anti-green (using disposable plates for no reason, wiping down their house with Clorox wipes, buying all kinds of junk food I would never give my kids, not recycling), I feel like telling them about my efforts would be seen as such an affront to their entire lifestyle and daily choices, I just can’t go there. They look amusedly at my kids’ stainless steel sippy cups and don’t ever ask for any more information.
On the other hand, I try to let my friends know I do this stuff, and then when people want more information, they can come to me. I feel like moms are so overwhelmed in general, I try not to contribute to their anxiety. Many folks want to go green, and know they should, and take steps as they have the time and energy to do so.
This is why I call myself an “Eco-novice.” I care about these issues, but I’m just not always willing to put myself out there and offend others. However, my kids aren’t school age yet. When they are, I’ll be happy to raise a stink at the schools. I taught school, and am not afraid to make waves about some things.
Betsy (Eco-novice) says
Inspired by Beth’s link, here’s an old post of mine about going green with a reluctant spouse:
http://www.eco-novice.com/2010.....ctant.html
Anna@Green Talk says
@Betsy and @Beth, I love your links about your husbands. Another great Skinny Scoop poll. Anna
Lori Popkewitz Alper says
The deer in headlights comment made me laugh-I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve gotten that response. As a parent in my community I’m finding it beyond frustrating-to the point where I’ve almost given up. Our K-2nd grade school barely recycles and I can’t stand it! Going to events at the school and watching children (who are taught to recycle at home) throw away plastic water bottles in the regular trash drives me batty. Why isn’t anyone in our community speaking up and voicing their concern? Maybe they’re not concerned.
I really try hard not to push anything on anyone-“no judgment ever” is my motto. We all have to do what works for each of us. It is funny to see how closely people are watching us…..noticing when we do use a Ziplock or forget our reusable bags!
Swamp Thing says
Yes. It sucks. Why would I sit in a tree/swamp and freeze to kill an animal, only to have to butcher it myself, when I can go buy a hamburger? Why do I spend all my time growing a crazy productive garden when everybody knows that Wal Mart has a special on produce this week (Venezualan lettuce is the best!).
I live in a very liberal “green” area. It’s very frustrating to know that I would have a hundred buddies calling to hang out every night if I wanted to sit and watch IFC documentaries about the destruction of the planet, or have moveon.org parties at the house where everybody lounges around, drinks expensive beer shipped from Colorado, and complains about Republicans, but no support whatsoever to clean up our neighborhood park, grow our own food, or take full ethical responsibility for animals that die for my food (only way to do that is to kill them yourself IMO). It all seems so common sense.
But I reckon that all these crazy ideas would likely interfere with “Veggie and Wing Night” or the next “Sex and the City 3” party.
Anna@Green Talk says
Swamp thing, I wish you lived near me. I can relate. Sometimes there is such a disconnect. Veggie and Wing Night…that is so funny. By the way, I saw on your website you planted crop cover. When did you plant? I am in zone 5 and garden all the way to November in some of my beds. Anna
Swamp Thing says
Around Nov 1 (zone 7) I planted mammoth red clover and Austrian field peas. We (@ work managing wildlife habitat) have been using Austrian field peas as a winter game food plot species for years, and it just does great.
I planted the peas two different ways (raked in, sown in rows) and the clover in two different ways (surface sown, deep sown), and the peas won in a landslide. Now they are almost waist tall – ready to cut them and plant summer crops – our last frost date is May 1.
Here’s the link to that post, if you’re interested: http://rivermud.blogspot.com/2.....sults.html
thanks for the kind words!!!!
Anna@Green Talk says
Swamp, will the peas last in zone 5 and will I be fighting the weeds in the spring? Anna
Brian says
The peas should winterkill in zone 5. Mine do, though we’re on the edge of zone 4/5. The covers that survive here are winter rye and hairy vetch. Rye is relatively easy to kill with the rototiller if you hit it early. The vetch can be more trouble — gets tangled up in my ancient machine.
Swamp Thing says
That sounds reasonable. Our temps rarely get down below 8-10 F but if they do (and there’s no snow cover over the peas), the peas look AWFUL come March 15th. They have always rebounded for us though. But I bet Zone 7 is probably the northern edge for reliable overwintering.
Steph says
Yes, yes and yes!
Anna, thanks for the post, I live in a blue southern state where I frequently feel like the biggest buzz kill. Even without opening my mouth, just seeing my actions and knowing my business, aquaintances often apologize to me for doing something earth unfriendly (I have SO been there with the plastic water bottles at B-day parties /school functions example!). Who made me the eco police?!! 😉 I know there is so much more I could be doing to decrease my footprint… thanks for all the great advice and encouragement!
Anna@Green Talk says
I know how you feel. Everyone looks at me and says, “we aren’t using paper, Anna.” As if I going to arrest them or something. Awkward! Anna